I have recently been coaching a number of middle managers. Although they work in wildly diverse roles and contexts, many of them raised a similar issue. This underlying issue was described in a variety of ways.
A team member with a bad attitude.
A serious performance issue.
Time management pressures.
Loss of control and low job satisfaction.
A team member with a bad attitude.
A serious performance issue.
Time management pressures.
Loss of control and low job satisfaction.
Communication clarity
Underneath this issue for many of my clients was a lack of communication clarity. Or in some cases, lack of knowing how best to approach a conversation about the problem.
The person with a bad attitude had never been told this and team members had always worked around the problem.
The performance issue was masked through talk of over work.
The loss of control happened because a boss was putting more and more projects on a good manager.
When exploring why these highly articulate, bright and passionate managers struggled with having these crucial conversations, it often led into further discussion and examination of how they felt about their role as managers in a 3rd sector organisation.
Very few of the managers had experienced any formal management training and had been promoted internally. This combination led them into a familiar situation with now significantly different work relationships with their ex-peers. Some felt it inappropriate or too difficult to ask colleagues to do things or change behaviour. So, they had tried to overcome these issues by working very long hours.
The person with a bad attitude had never been told this and team members had always worked around the problem.
The performance issue was masked through talk of over work.
The loss of control happened because a boss was putting more and more projects on a good manager.
When exploring why these highly articulate, bright and passionate managers struggled with having these crucial conversations, it often led into further discussion and examination of how they felt about their role as managers in a 3rd sector organisation.
Very few of the managers had experienced any formal management training and had been promoted internally. This combination led them into a familiar situation with now significantly different work relationships with their ex-peers. Some felt it inappropriate or too difficult to ask colleagues to do things or change behaviour. So, they had tried to overcome these issues by working very long hours.
Assertiveness at work
Our coaching conversations often turned to individual's rights and expectations in the workplace. I found myself quoting a book called Assertiveness at Work by Roger and Kate Back. They define assertive behaviour as;
"Standing up for your own rights in such a way that you do not violate another person's rights" and later in the same book "expressing your needs, wants, opinions, feelings and beliefs in direct, honest and appropriate ways."
For some clients this was a "light bulb" moment that led to much healthier dialogue at work and improved productivity, feedback and job satisfaction. Others requested further help and found role play scenarios an effective way to practice this new skill and gain confidence.
"Standing up for your own rights in such a way that you do not violate another person's rights" and later in the same book "expressing your needs, wants, opinions, feelings and beliefs in direct, honest and appropriate ways."
For some clients this was a "light bulb" moment that led to much healthier dialogue at work and improved productivity, feedback and job satisfaction. Others requested further help and found role play scenarios an effective way to practice this new skill and gain confidence.
If this sounds like a familiar situation, then you may find it helpful to read around the subject. I found the following books insightful.
Assertiveness at Work by Back and Back
Crucial Conversations by Patterson et al.
Should you wish to develop your skills in a more practical manner you can review my latest training course programme here.
Assertiveness at Work by Back and Back
Crucial Conversations by Patterson et al.
Should you wish to develop your skills in a more practical manner you can review my latest training course programme here.
